“Finally, all of you, live in harmony with one another; be sympathetic, love as brothers, be compassionate and humble” (1 Peter 3:8).
“Live in harmony” is literally “Be like-minded.” It doesn’t mean that we have to like the same things in everyday life. I like chocolate but don’t like cherry pie so much. Many of my friends have different tastes in food but we still love each other. “Live in harmony” has to do with agreement on things that really matter. We agree that Jesus is our Savior, our heavenly Father loves us and the Holy Spirit is an awesome gift from heaven. We may not agree on every minor detail of doctrine, but we think the same way about the essentials of our faith.
The qualities of sympathy, love, compassion and humility always promote harmony. They are the traits produced in us by our faith in Jesus. Our new nature that comes with salvation naturally leads to these attitudes. Pride and arrogance get in the way of lasting, loving relationships both with God and with others. C. S. Lewis remarked about pride, “There is no fault which makes a man more unpopular, and no fault which we are more unconscious of in ourselves. And the more we have it in ourselves, the more we dislike it in others.”
All the attitudes mentioned by Peter are intended to bring us into healthy relationships with other people. The Christian life isn’t a solo venture. It is lived out in a community. Peter was simply reminding us to allow God to help us be the kind of people who get along well with others.
If you were to ask me, “What makes a person likeable?” I would suggest that displaying sympathy, love, compassion and humility would work pretty well. If you followed with “How do I get these?” I would tell you what I’ve learned. They aren’t products of my old nature, which still surfaces far too often. They are part of the new nature that comes with our new birth in Christ. Given time that fruit will grow and will inevitably come to the surface and characterize our lives.
